In San Francisco

So good to be here in this city I love. Seeing my kids has been so wonderful and finally I'm starting to feel rested.
I arrived Christmas night-my friend Dan picked me up and drove me to his house where a lively party was in progress. Ribs, 20 crabs, shrimp-lots of wine and laughter. I was a little overwhelmed as I had thought we were having a small dinner party with my kids and ex. I wasn't able to hang out the whole night and crashed upstairs.
Last night my kids and I went to the movies-my son took the BART back to Hayward as he wasn't feeling so well. Kathleen came back with me to Suki's mother in law apartment which she so gratiously gave me to stay in while I'm in town. Right now Kathleen is asleep in a cloud of soft duvet. I sat outide drinking coffee and smoking-god it feels good here. The air cool and fresh-smells good and I'm taking it in. The energy of SF-the constant rumble of cars and electricity. I slept so well last night-Suki's neighborhood is so quiet and now I'm realizing that I miss quiet-at least moments of it. And to be in a bed-so luxurious.
I miss this city and I miss the friends I have here. Looking forward or back to New Orleans-the air is not fresh there-it is not California or Washington and yet I love the culture there more. Suki also lent me a car and I instantly found myself driving around this crazy city just as I used to as if no time has passed. Yet-it really has and this is no longer "my" city. I want to keep it in my back pocket. I want it to be there for me but alas-I sold my last piece of property here and therefore gave up on living the rest of my life here. It's too damn expensive to consider a return at this point. It makes me feel sad. I lost part of myself here.
Yet, had I not made that move I would never have had the experience of really getting to know my sisters in Seattle and I seriously doubt that I would have ended up volunteering in New Orleans. It's like whatever decision you make you find yourself in a new place with new challeges. Here, it's coming up with high rent or high mortgage to pay and the constant stress of that. In return I had the oppurtunity to live in an amazing place-unlike any other city. This city is changing. Its losing some or much of it's unique diversity and becoming a city of the very wealthy americans. It is still very very beautiful.
I'm going to drink in it's beauty and enjoy every moment I can steal from my kids and my friends. I feel so very lucky to have the friends I have-all have been exceptional people and of course my kids are the best in the world:) I think it's the people that draw me to a place so it's almost counterintuitive to leave SF behind. The skill of meeting new people and weeding out the wrong ones-I have that (at least I hope I do) but it does take time to develop friendships. I think I'll keep my friends here in SF and Seattle and New Orleans and do my best to keep them alive by communicating and visiting. Forever the prodigal daughter....

Christmas Eve New Orleans

I'm leaving for San Francisco on Christmas day. All of the volunteers except me and 2 others are here. The bunk house is eerie and strange. I couldn't wait for the large college groups of volunteers to leave-I was dying for some quiet time. Yet after they all left I felt empty and sad. Without the others and the work we do,it is nothing.
Yesterday was beautiful-clear skies. I walked around the French Quarter for hours just trying to get centered before returning "home", San Francisco. Then for a week in January it will be Seattle. Suddenly the realization that I don't have my own home is hitting me. I've been so at peace with that in the past 3 months but now that I'm on my way to see my kids in SF I feel bad that I have to see them at a friend's house and not in a place they can call home. I feel anxiety-it seems like reality is about to hit me. I just have to work through it.
I have to say that my time here in New Orleans has been one of most gratifying experiences I've ever had and I can honestly say that I have been truly happy. I'm coming back in January because, I'm just not finished here.
Happy Holidays to y'all.

Pictures from the past week.

December 19th, 2006

Friday December 15th

I'm sitting in my bunk-it's almost quiet enough to concentrate. I'm working on cleaning up the outside area as some VIP-a senator? is coming over for a tour later today. It's a mess out there-paint materials, tools, respirators and gloves everywhere. We have been so busy here with huge groups coming in and huge groups leaving. On Wednesday we participated in a 350+group of volunteers in an effort to clean up parks, gut houses and repair and build playgrounds all on one street: Oretha Castle Haley Blvd. It was sponsored by Timberland. The CEO and executives worked together to gut a really disgusting house. It was impressive. So many organizations and local businesses participated and I found it to be so inspirational. The closing ceremony had some great speeches and a Dixieland band. Everyone was dirty and tired and happy.
I worked with a crew on building planter boxes-breaking down the old contaminated ones-cleaned up a school playground so that it can be used again. My arms were toast at the end of the day from running wheelbarrows of dirt from one area to the other. But everyone was doing hard labor and I felt so happy to be part of it. The funniest thing I saw was a group of college students who spent the entire day building one planter box...They spent so much time debating how it should be done...Meanwhile we built 2, painted them, put dirt in them, planted plants in them and cleaned up a park. The phase we like to use is, "Get'er done!" Still they were there doing their thing. Let me just say that most of the college students don't do this--it was just this particular group.
Yesterday I found out that the IRS wants to audit me for 2005-they were already auditing my 2004 return. I freaked out as the letter said I had to come up with all my records by Dec 31st-I'm here. I live in a bunk and don't have access to all my records, most of which are in a storage unit in Seattle. After I calmed down I called them and requested another deadline and requested that I can do my complete interview over the phone. I would hate to pay for another plane ticket at this point. They piss me off so much. We are talking about a very small amount of money that will either be owed to me or owed to them. Whatever!
Last night I walked to the French Quarter to Frenchman Street to go and hear a gypsy jazz band called VA VA VOOM-they were amazing. Accordion, bass, 2 guitarists, an amazing violinist and soprano sax. I was blown away by their music-you could not help but move your body to it-it was very soulful and wild. Jack Fine-I've mentioned him before haven't I? He is in his 70s, well known NO trumpet player who has played with all the greats-Billie Holiday-Django-Frank Sinatra,ect...has become my friend and was there last night. He always has these great stories to tell. Anyways, I'm sitting in the back of the room with him listening to the band and he pulls his trumpet out of the case and just starts playing. The band members are smiling as he can do this anytime, sitting in the back playing bad ass licks---I'm mean bad ass!

I took a taxi home at midnight and had a real hard time getting out of bed this morning. I'm feeling tired today and look forward to having Sunday off.

December 12th

This picture is of me and a demolding crew eating Krispy Creme (sp)? donuts and drinking coffee. It was very cold and the homeowner ran out to get us these treats. It definitely raised the moral.

In the past week I've done days of demolding and scouting homes that have been on the waiting list. We basically try to assess what needs to be done to it and whether or not the house is a teardown or not.
Last Saturday I talked with one homeowner and used her FEMA trailer to pee and after I walked out and closed the door we realized that we were locked out. One window was open and with the help of a neighbor I was boosted up and went through the window. That's the second window I have gone through in one week. The other time was when I was scrubbing mold up in the rafters and lost balance. I reached out for the wall but instead hit a window which shattered and I went through it. Believe it or not I didn't get a single scratch from that. Me and ladders just can't seem to make peace. I love the physical work of demolding or gutting a house as it's so satisfying. I'm doing well overall-my spirit has been strong and I feel healthy. I'm learning to respect my limitations and honor them. In the long run I last longer that way. I'm also learning how to get along with people who bug me-I can't get away from them so it's a matter of surviving here. And the bonus is that I find I have more energy when I'm not angry and frustrated.


I'm sitting in my bunk-listening to a children's choir rehearsing in the church-on my other side are animated conversations as people get ready to go out. Me-I'm staying in tonight and getting lots of rest. Tomorrow about 500 volunteers from all over are participating in one day effort to restore local parks and build playgrounds and soccer fields for the kids in this area.

About 50 of our volunteers are leaving at the end of the week and another 80 will come in over the weekend.
Today I helped the chef make dinner-it was an easy meal-meatloaf, mashed potatoes, green beans and salad-comfort food always goes over well. Today it rained and the temperature went back up. Hoping it doesn't rain tomorrow. Tired. Going to bed now.

pics from scouting houses; Knox college volunteers

December 9th, 2006

Pics of Georgia's house and demolding.

Georgia's house and de-molding a house.

First Week Back in the Big Easy

I've been back a week. It feels as if I never left only I'm more rested and centered after 2 weeks in Seattle. I haven't jumped back into the harder work of gutting houses and demolding. I've been working on murals for the past week. It's getting cold here at night-below freezing last night. During the day it's not too bad but the wind chill will get you. The area we were working in was like a wind tunnel and we had to wear several layers. But it was fun to paint again and I got some great props for my work. I was given free license to improvise-yeah.
My typical day is like this. 7am the lights and music come on. Now that I've moved my bunk to the very back it's not so shocking. Anyone who signs up for breakfast set up can chose the music we wake up to and I swear it can affect my entire day. I'm either in a real shitty mood because of it or I'm dancing. I crawl out of my bunk-I massage my feet before standing on them-this takes a few minutes. I walk toward the kitchen area where several volunteers are getting cereal-usually super cheap sugar cereal-yuck. We have these super small bowls so the milk and cereal slouches all over the tables and floors. Others are making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Most don't talk or look up-others are nuts. Me-I am looking to see if coffee is made and if it's not I grumble and make it myself, avoiding all communication with others.
Like I said if the music sucks I grumble under my stinky morning breath while making coffee.
As the hour between 7 and 8 progresses the volume increases expedientially. More people are up getting to showers, the restrooms, getting lunch, shouting out for their teams, getting equipment loaded up into the trucks and gathering the water jugs. The aisles between the bunks is crowded as I slither here and there. There are quiet "good mornings" and "excuse me-s" going back and forth. Lots of tired sleepy people trying to move fast. Some of the people just came in the night before and are dazed and confused. They stand in the way and apologize for their existence and while I am empathetic I don't have time to help them out. Then it's work time-either traveling in a van with co-workers to a job site or in my case this week it's getting the painting materials together and a big boom box(most important tool) and we load it up in a wheelbarrow and walk it to the school. Lunch break usually around noon and then the push towards clean up time-usually around 4pm-getting back to eat a huge wonderful meal at 5:30pm. Group meeting at 6pm. The group meeting consists of welcoming new people, crew reports, announcements, stud awards and then goodbyes to all that are leaving. These meetings are getting really old for me-rah rah-kumbaya-yadayadayadaya. Today we had a raffle for tickets to see the Williams sisters play against each other (Serena and Venus Williams-tennis stars for those who aren't tennis fans:)
Then you see people reading, getting ready to go out in groups to whatever-people standing in line for showers-groups of 2 or 3 in bunks talking or watching a downloaded movies together. Girls in the bathroom blowing their hair, talking,putting on makeup. Right now I can hear 5 or 6 conversations going on. It's hard to focus. In general though the sound is happy.
Back to the first week. I had a warm reception when I came back-that felt really good. My bunk was taken so I had to find one of the few left. Most of us went out to Mother-in-Laws Lounge Friday night. So fun. Gambolaya, R&B,dancing.
Sunday on my day off I spent all day walking around the French Quarter. I didn't realize how huge this area was/is. It's big. I love it there and though the wind was cold and I wasn't dressed for it I had a great time. Around 4pm I met up with my new friend, Georgia. We went to a great yarn store, went out to dinner with her friend Jack Fine at this amazing restaurant called ?? Alphonsos? I'll have to check on that. It was Italian-Cajun cuisine. Then we went to the Spotted Cat to hear jazz-then on to another club where they played classic jazz and I met the grand master of Mardi Gras-an older gentleman-he must have been in his late 80s. Had the great suit and gold tipped cane-got up and sang, "Do you know what it means to miss New Orleans?"
It was a sweet night and I felt right at home here. It reminds me of SF in some ways but it is unlike any other city I've been to. I know is sounds vague but I don't know exactly why I love it here so much. It's dirty, gritty-has a lot of big problems and a lot of really nice people.

Pics from first week back in NO

First week back in NO